Stay Inspired.

My life is f*cking fantastic.

It has been a year since I've last posted here. Just over even. A long, tough and rewarding year filled with tears and laughter, with severe anxiety issues and pure happiness, with thoughts of quitting it all and starting life all over again and overwhelming joy of staying put and absorbing the warmth of the oh so familiar surroundings . What a full life I live. And I am sure as hell not taking it for granted.

Life can be scary sometimes. One day you wake up and you are not eighteen anymore. Better yet, you are not twenty two either. The numbers in the date section of your passport seems to never change but somehow you are slowly approaching thirty. At least that is what people around you are telling you. You are suddenly pressured into being an adult, making important decision, and maintaining a social life with all your friends and family. Then you start noticing how ridiculous sixteen-year-olds look walking around with a face full of cheap drug-store-bough make up that they have not yet mastered, how slutty their clothes look and how bad they want to seem tough and sexy. I know I know, we have all been there and I am not an exception. I used to not understand why do you need a foundation brush to apply your makeup when you can do it with your fingers. Lets not go there today, that is a completely different story. But it makes me think every day. Every. Day. I wake up as usual, I get ready for work, I hurry home to spend time with my loved one and I go to bed. Day in, day out. And then one day I pass one of my "plant-babies" that I have planted a few weeks ago and I had to look twice - It has grown so big! Hard to believe that it has grown that much in a few weeks... And then I realise it has been half a year since I had it. That was an eye-opener for me personally. Yes, a plant was an eye opener. I realised how quick the time flew by and how different my plant looks now, what I thought was a very short period of time. And I was the same woman I was a year ago.

Lets think now, if a plant can look so different, grown and beautiful after a few months whats stopping you to grow and develop EVERY DAY like my plant-baby did. Here is where you say - yeah but we have work/kids/pets/responsibilities. Well don't we all? I am not saying - drop everything and invest all time and resource  you have in yourself. That would be just silly of me. What I am saying is - start tracking everything you do, that makes you who you are. That way you can see if you are growing or are you just living your mundane life without any exiting changes.

If you want to know how I am handling keeping track of my every day life and still managing to work stupid hours at work, keep my house looking presentable-ish and stay sane, then the answer is - Bullet Journal! I will probably make a post devoted purely to my fabulous journal because  there is just so much to show and tell. Cannot recommend it enough. But with the help of my beautiful Bullet Journal I have managed to find time for myself. Got a page for my monthly habit tracker up and running and made a list of every-day tasks and chores that I do and put a "Me Time" section in it. And all of a sudden - Boom! - I have no excuse of not keeping that task going. It might be silly things, or on the contrary very important bullet points in your life, whatever matters to you, but you just track it. and make sure it is happening. And when you go almost a week without marking that as done then my friend it is time to raise red flags.

I consider quite a few things to be my "Me Time". Anything that brings me joy goes on the list:

1. Got my nails done. - Me time.

2. Had full 2 hours of reading a book. - Me time.

3. Went shopping for new plants. - Me me meee time!

4. Sat down to watch a musical film and sang along to every song? - Yes for me time.

5. Sitting comfy on the sofa with Lilly Allen blasting through my speakers whilst typing up this post right at this very moment? - Very long waited me time. 

And I started to feel happier. Very tired as well I have to say, but happier. Tired because I not only track the fun bits, but also track the boring  things you do without realising how much time it takes up - washing, cleaning, cooking and all the other not as exciting things. I fell like you have to track them as well in order to balance off your "Me Time" and all other time you have. I still do the dishes and iron the laundry, but now I make sure I balance that time off with something that identifies me, something that develops me, makes me grow as an individual. Of course I tend to run out of hours in a day, and I keep falling asleep far too early in the evening because I am as tired as if i walked across the world on my own two feet (which makes me feel so old its ridiculous), but i have been keeping myself busy thanks to this and I truly think that I have achieved a lot since I started this journal. I have a very healthy routine now and I am not stopping it any time soon. No matter what anyone says, you do what makes you happy.  Its the magic of not giving a f*ck.

Now let me go grab a good book, get comfy and let my life continue with its turns and roller-coasters of emotions. It is all worth it. Every single bit.